It’s kind of a requirement to be kind to the person you’re seeing.
Heres what i know:
-If they hold things over your head to be right- they don’t love you.
-If they bring up things from the past that have been sorted out just because they don’t want what they did to be wrong- they don’t love you.
-If they call you terrible things that cause extreme emotional damage and do not stop- they don’t love you.
-If they don’t support and encourage you and laugh at your pain- they don’t love you.
This list could pretty much go on, and on, and on.
Last one- if you have to keep reminding this person of those thing above and they do not change or grow or choose to be kind to you then its toxic.
Love is hard, but love is easy. Being kind to the person you love is easy. Being supportive and encouraging to the person you love is easy. Being best friends with the person you love is easy.
MOST IMPORTANTLY: MAKING THE PERSON YOU LOVE YOUR PRIORITY IS EASY WHEN YOU LOVE THEM.
Fixing what you did.
Being there when they need you.
Making sure they know you matter more than their friends.
Why is this so difficult for couples?
Otherwise, LEAVE. If your not happy, if you’re not in love, if it’s terrible, if its making you a terrible person then leave. Move on. It’s not that difficult.